Totally bummed by a good review

This is so weird. I get a fantastic review and I'm totally devastated by one line in it.

It basically puts Eclipse Court in the same orchestra as Philosopher in Arms and implies that it is secondary... it is the 'harmony' to PA's 'melody'. Secondary theme!

Jesus. It is my own work and it's own 'melody'. It is NOT a lesser reflection or echo to anything else. I'm sure it was meant as descriptive rather than comparative, but it still hurts.

Off to lick my wounds and post the next bit of my work.

Learning

Today a friend came over and taught Tristan and I to fire rifles. We tried the .22, the 12 gauge, and the 30.06. The 30.06 has about the same kickback as the shotgun but it feels like it has so much more authority. It feels very different.

Wow. Interesting and a first step toward our FAC's.

Considering Quitting

I woke up today and seriously considered quitting writing for a while. What has it ever gotten be but heartache?

It's either the creative heartache or monetary and to be honest I'm much better at flaying and filleting myself creatively.

I have too much of my self-esteem tied up with the words I produce and it seems I've chosen a life both destined and doomed to be obscure. I've been saying that to be a writer one has to be persistent and consistent.

Right now, all I am is tired.

Wondering what the hell I'm doing

I'm sitting here feeling lower than a snakes navel. I have people telling me they like what I'm doing but I cannot convince everyone to throw me so much as a dollar on paypal. One fan in Denmark did, a while ago.

Now I'm wondering if it's right to ask at all for monetary support.

I cannot keep doing this. 300 dollars since March does not a living make.

I'm going to have to stop it seems, or slow down and this is the thing I really want to do.

One of my doofus dogs

This is Hoover. He just turned three and is a total klutz about stepping on people's feet. He's still enough of a pup that he doesn't know where his own feet are.

Of course Rio still doesn't and he's nine.

I'll profile the sons of bitches here and the bitch herself.

Then I'll show you the cat I work for and eventually the new kitten.

I have too many animals but if I didn't I'd probably just aquire more. I acrue animals and we like each other. I feel incomplete without a dog or a cat. I've had birds and fish... oh... the fish... yeah I have to show you them too.

I will be getting chickens. I'd like peacocks too. See? I'm nuts this way. Sigh. You'll eventually see all of them.

When I was the freaky kid the dog was my best buddy. He was my job, my playmate. He climbed trees with me and went on every piece of the playground equipment. He spent summer afternoons in a tree, on my lap, while I read. Poor dog, he bore the brunt of my need to control something in my life and forgave me for it all.

Animals never used me, not like people. Animals had no agenda and they valued me and loved me both.

No longer driving a Molotov Cocktail

The gas leak in my car has been fixed. I still have the exhaust to fix but at least noise isn't quite so dangerous.

Have a look at the red-neck hoist...

Random Poetry

A Modern Fate

Damn,
says Clotho.
Another run in my nylons!
Antropos, lend me
your scissors.